CHAPTER ONE
INTRODUCTION
1.0Background to the Study
Marriage is the legally, sexually, socially sanctioned union of two intimate adults. Traditionally, the marital relationship includes economic independence, common residence, sexual fidelity and shared responsibility for children. Although, the institution of marriage remains popular, it sometimes seems to be under assault from shifting social trends. This assault has promoted some experts, for example, Chartin (1981) and Gleen and Wearer (1988) to ask whether the institution of marriage is in trouble.
It in any case, appears that marriage will whither the storm. But it is worth looking at some of the social trends that are shaking one traditional and modern model of marriages.
According to Jones (1994) a great variety of motivational factors propel people into marriage. The most among them is the desire to participate in a socially sanctioned, mutually rewarding, intimate relationship. Among the key factors is the social pressure exorted on people to marry and the socio-economic independence which make marriage to work well. Getting marriage is still the norm in our society. Our parents, relatives and friends expect their loved ones to marry eventually, and they often make this abundantly clear with their comments and inquires. (Anorne 1994).
As Onyeji (1999) puts it, the popular view in the Nigerian culture is that people marry because they have fallen in love. Although, partially accurate, this view, is terribly oversimplified. A multitude of motivational factors are involved in the decision to marry and stay married. They key factors in marital stability are: increased acceptance of cohabitation, good family background, adequate communication, absence of inlaws’ interruption, having the same religion, maintaining the same account, fidelity or sincerity, integrity, lack of suspicion and above all, high socio-economic status.
Neither financial stability nor wealth can ensure marital stability or satisfaction (Komarorsky 1997).
Komarorsky went on to postulate that without money, families live in constant dread of financial drains such as illness layoffs, or broken appliances. Husbands tend to view themselves as poor providers, and their self-esteem may crumble as a result. This problem is sometimes aggravated by disappointed wives, who criticize their husbands for their inability to provide for the family.
According to Amaonye (1998), spontaneity in communication may be impaired by an understandable reluctance to talk about financial concerns. Thus, it is clear that poverty produces significant stress for married couples. Given this reality, it is important that prospective partners be realistic about their ability to finance a viable future.
Moreover, when financial resources are plentiful, money can be a source of marital strain (Adeleke, 1991).
According to Adeleke (1991), quarrels about how to spend money are common and potentially damaging at all income levels. Pattman and Llyod (1998), for instance, found that perceived financial stress, regardless of a family’s actual income was associated with decreased marital satisfaction.
Furthermore, another study carried out by Martins and Martins (1996), examined how happily couples handled their money in comparison to couples that eventually divorced. In comparison to the divorced couples, the happy couples engaged in more joint decision making on finances. Thus, the best way to avoid trouble and some battles over money is probably to engage in extensive planning of expenditure together (Buss, 1986).
Again, Ochemba (1999) opines that money is very important for the stability of many families. According to him, without money, there may not be marital bliss and love which are the core ingredients couples need to stay together as one indivisible entity. In a research carried out by Ochefu (1992), it was found that in the high socio-economic status families, there tend to be happiness, love and affection than in the low or poor socio-economic homes. Eraser (1983) asserts that in the high socio-economic status homes, parents stay together in love, children are provided with their needs and there tend to be high level of mutual understanding. Whereas, in the poor homes, parents constantly fight each other because the husband could not provide for the family or the children’s school fee’s cannot be paid as at when due.
Also, Anyanwu (1980) is of the opinion that in a family where there is poverty and lack, there tends to be unfaithfulness, disrespect, fighting, quarrelling and these can lead couples to break up their marriages or they may live like cat and mouse in the same house. The problem of socio-economic status of couples and its effects on their marital stability is what prompted this researcher to embark on this work.
Issues of mutual concerns have to be talked about freely and without any inhibition. Efforts should be made to talk over difficulties and work out acceptable-solutions. Expressions of feelings and readiness to tell the marriage partner what you expect him or her to do are necessary before behaviours can be modified to suit a given situation (Ayodele, 1990).